Kings and Pelicans pull off one of the most lopsided trades in NBA History

Mere moments after the conclusion of last night’s NBA All Star Game, news hit Twitter of a blockbuster trade so monumentally one sided people everywhere mocked the intelligence of the owners involved and questioned how the league could let it happen. I mean, look at this:

Once again: BUDDY HIELD, Tyreke Evans, Langston Galloway, one future first-round pick & one future second for DeMarcus Cousins, sources say

— Marc Stein (@ESPNSteinLine) February 20, 2017

The Kings were able to get Tyreke Evans back, and all they had to give up was DeMarcus Cousins. The most dynamic player in franchise history is coming home, poised to take the Kings deep into the playoffs. Check out these highlights and tell me the Kings didn’t just commit highway robbery.

In all seriousness, this is embarrassing for the Kings. DeMarcus better have personally promised he’d kill everyone in the Kings front office with his bare hands if he wasn’t traded ASAP. I’ve never seen a worse return for a star player. This roster is now borderline Nets-level of ineptitude. I’d be surprised if they won another five games. And, in true Kings fashion, the 76ers have the rights to swap first round picks with them this season. Odds are the Kings are gonna wind up with a pretty high draft pick. I can’t wrap my mind around how the Kings thought this offer of a bag of basketballs and a couple tubes of floor wax was good enough for arguably the best center in the league. And what were the Celtics doing? You couldn’t top that? What were you thinking? All this team needs is a dominant rebounder and interior scorer. Gee, I wonder if any recently traded for nothing player fits that description? What are they saving it for? Don’t tell me Jimmy Butler. Please, for the love of God don’t tell me they’re going to trade the next two Nets picks for Jimmy Butler. He’s just a much more skilled version of Marcus Smart. That’s not gonna suddenly make them good enough to beat Cleveland. At this point I’ll be very upset if they trade any of these picks. They’re not winning the title in the next two years. Big deal. Keep the Nets picks, both of which are virtually guaranteed to be top 3. The top 3 of this draft is crazy good. Take a franchise player this year. Take a top end talent next year. By the time the those players are mature, LeBron won’t be LeBron anymore (hopefully) and the Warriors will have broken up. What’s the problem with patience? Cousins was the only player that would have made it interesting with the Cavs. What does Jimmy Butler do? Make them lose in 6 games instead of 5? No thanks. Danny Ainge gets propped up a lot for the Nets trade, but in my mind, he’ll lose a lot of that credit if he turns those picks and a couple of players already on the roster into only Jimmy Butler.