Monday Thoughts, Week 8


Halloween week in the NFL, and I’ll be honest- it was scary how stinky the games were. Early game stunk. One good 1 o’clock game. One good 4 o’clock game. Night game stunk but I was mostly just watching the Red Sox win the World Series again. But you know what a terrible group of games does? Makes Monday Thoughts™ a lot easier! Because when it’s a bunch of crappy games no one cares about, no notices if I give minimal effort only deliver medium-grade content instead of the typical elite level. Mediocrity, it’s perfectly fine!

  • Jags are donzo, friends.
  • The Jags decided to go with the always fresh and enjoyable tactic of updating their Twitter name after every win, adding another U to #Duval (Jacksonville is in Duval County if, for some reason, you aren’t familiar with Florida counties). This probably seemed like a better idea in week 2
  • I don’t know if the Eagles are good again. Maybe win two in a row first. I do know that they’re real boring and only had one exciting play the entire game
  • This year’s London games…..not good.
  • Andy Reid’s cruelty to gamblers notwithstanding, the Chiefs offense is in full wagon mode
  • Do people really call Travis Kelce Zeus?
  • Alright, you know what my real Monday Thoughts™ are this week? These games SUCKED and all I care about is that the Red Sox won the World Series for the fourth time in the last 15 years.
  • Just gonna power through some Thoughts because of the immense civic duty I feel towards my followers.
  • Steelers, for some reason I’m not aware of, went with their block numbers from the 70s instead of the modern font they use today, and I think it was an improvement
  • Hue Jackson is the Thanos of terrible coaches and the Browns are his Infinity Gauntlet.
  • LIVE BREAKING NEWS: Hue Jackson fired. That’s what makes Monday Thoughts™ great.
  • Okay, there was one thing I cared about: Fitzmagic is back.
  • I love this man so much. The couple weeks on the bench was just what the doctor ordered to reset the Magic meter. They have no choice but to start him the rest of the season.
  • Jameis is AWFUL, but I’ll miss his funny picks
  • I’ve never seen a sadder QB
  • Long live Fitz (who cares if they lost)
  • What did the Bears cook up for the Jets?
  • Green Starscream? Are you serious? That’s WAY too cool for the Jets. I’d like to log a complaint.
  • I’d like it to be known that I’ve been right about the Ravens and Panthers every step of the way.
  • I know it was garbage time, but it’s funny how the Ravens offense woke up when they finally let Lamar Jackson actually play quarterback.
  • Absurdly hot jacket
  • This man will NEVER post unsolicited highlights from NFC divisional games, regardless of how many Odell highlights there are.
  • Have to wonder what Unwritten Rule Doug Baldwin broke to get a fastball off the knee
  • Fox switched Dean Blandino in for Mike Pereira as their in-game rules expert. I dislike this. Aside from Dean’s involvement in the sham that was Deflategate, he has the camera presence of a cardboard box. Dean Blandino is the name of a wrestling heel, not an NFL rules expert.
  • Raiders are dead.
  • Jaquiski Tartt has my favorite name in the NFL.
  • I feel so bad for Dick Stockton. Every week he’s assigned to the Ca******s and I’m worried it’s going to kill him.
  • A high snap is the perfect way for a CJ Beathard game to end.
  • Think the Cali Brah grounds crew got a little too high and got too much In-N-Out and forgot to finish the field in the Coliseum
  • R.I.P. anyone who had Rams and the over (me)
  • Packers might be back.
  • I think I was a little premature calling the Vikings the second best team in the NFC.
  • Adam Thielen is obviously gritty and sneaky athletic, but if you’re a hater who still thinks he’s not one of the three best receivers in the NFL I don’t really know what to tell you.
  • Vikings defense is good again, regardless of the fact they gave up 30. Kirk Cousins is shaky again.
  • I fully acknowledge this was the worst Monday Thoughts™. As I’ve said three times, now, I don’t really care. The Red Sox just won the World Series, after all.

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