Monday Thoughts Week 11


Week 11. Monday Thoughtsβ„’. My entire life has been leading up to this moment. Yours has, too. This is the most important moment in the history of the world. To waste it would be an insult to the football gods.

  • Since the Pats were on bye I had to pay closer attention to the rest of the league, and, I have to say, I have no idea how the rest of the country deals with watching non-Patriots football every week.
  • Lamar Jackson got the start with Flacco out, and, you’ll never believe this, the offense was good with him in. Crazy, I know.
  • Someone named Gus Edwards had 115 rushing yards and a TD. That’s as sure a sign as any that the Bengals are toast.
  • It’s kind of weird, but I think the Ravens are better with Lamar but scarier as a potential playoff team with Flacco. I still wake up with cold sweats thinking about his miraculous Super Bowl run from time to time. I know he’s garbage and all, but I would loooooooooove to play against rookie Lamar Jackson in the playoffs.
  • I actually feel bad for Andy Dalton because he’s been pretty decent this year but the rest of the team is just awful. Such is life.
  • I’m addicted to Bucs’ QB play
  • Fitzpatrick and Winston have completely broken the Bucs’ coaches’ brains. They’re essentially the same player and they just can’t figure out which one has the hot hand on any given week. I suggest swapping them every half.
  • Are the Giants back?
  • Saquon never left
  • Odell never left, either.
  • I can already hear the sarcastic-but-hopeful cries from Giants’ fans that the league should watch out once the Giants get rolling. And I agree. Please don’t let them get hot. I beg you. I’ve seen this movie too many times. Someone beat them, like, one more time. That’s all it takes to kill this before it gets out of hand.
  • I’m going to say something nice about the Cowboys: they’re really good at making exciting teams play in really boring games.
  • I’m going to add another nice thing: their jerseys looked good in the Mercedes-Benz Stadium lighting.
  • I might be in the minority here, but I really like the MBS lighting. It’s a little harsh, but it’s unique. You know you’re watching a game in The Big Asshole.
  • Impromptu lighting/camera angle power ranking: 1. L.A. Coliseum when the sun is about to set (applies to the Rose Bowl, too, but this is NFL only) 2. Superdome 3. MBS 4. Soldier Field day and night 5. Hard Rock Stadium
  • Panthers-Lions was pretty boring but it was an especially bad jersey matchup. The camo accessories for the Salute to Service month looked absolutely atrocious with the Panthers’ all black.
  • Imagine having an 82 yard gain and not scoring
  • Has to be demoralizing.
  • It’s easy to bash Matt Stafford but I’ll be damned if he doesn’t throw some pornographic passes sometimes
  • Pretty inexplicable loss, honestly. Panthers might be playing with fire if they keep this up.
  • Steelers-Jaguars was an exact replica of every time a lesser team had the Patriots on the ropes and couldn’t seal the deal over the last fifteen years. All that was missing was the losing team and everyone on Twitter complaining about how unfair it all was.
  • ThisΒ is perhaps the saltiest, most bitter article ever written. And his team won! Steelers people are wild, man.
  • Nice defense, fellas!
  • One of the ugliest touchdowns these eyes have ever seen
  • Allow me to speak for everyone invested in the AFC when I thank the Jaguars from the first three quarters of this game for just not bothering to show up for half the season.
  • No idea where the Jags really go from here. Last year it seemed like the world was their oyster and it was merely a matter of how many consecutive Super Bowls they would win. Now they’re probably facing yet another rebuild and have no answer at QB. But at least they like to talk trash, right?
  • Sucks for Alex Smith. Yeah, the Redskins are one of the three most boring teams in the NFL (along with the Cowboys and Eagles) and he’s not always great to watch, but seeing someone get that kind of injury just sucks.
  • Texas might be officially back, though. Colt McCoy never dies.
  • Also not to be that guy but, like, it wouldn’t be the worst thing ever if this meant we don’t have to watch a Redskins playoff game.
  • Texans are good in the most non-threatening way possible. Defense is nails.
  • This tuddy just looks cool
  • Absolutely brutal Titans performance. If only someone could have seen this coming.
  • I will say that Andrew Luck needs to finish in the top 3 in MVP this year. He’ll still have a 3 interception playoff loss, though.
  • T.Y. Hilton is back
  • Maybe the funniest interception ever
  • Don’t look now, but the Colts are the team no one wants to play (please let the Pats play them in the first round. Pleeeeeeeeeaaaaassseeeee).
  • If only there was a fearless blogger who declared that the Broncos weren’t that bad and that they’d beat the Chargers. What a crazy thing that would be.
  • Antonio Gates is still alive, at least
  • The Wildcat is Back
  • Somehow Von Miller has become underrated. Aaron Donald and the Watt Boyz and Khalil Mack get all the headlines, but Von is still one of the five best defensive players in the NFL and should be a lock for the Hall of Fame. He’s a machine.
  • Why I hate Twitter in a nutshell:
  • The Raiders won! Who needs Khalil Mack?
  • C*******s just lost letter privileges.
  • Did anyone in the world know Chandler Jones has 10.5 sacks already?
  • Derek Carr and Jon Gruden are ready to fight to the death and they don’t care who knows it
  • Eagles are doooooooonnnnnnnnnnnnneeeeeeeee. Good job, good effort, guys. At least everyone’s having fun out there.
  • Carson Wentz is complete ass.
  • Drew Brees was already the third best quarterback ever and now he’s having his best season
  • Saints are looking like an all time team right now. If they make a deep run this will be considered one of the best and most efficient offenses in league history.
  • Mitchell Trubisky was put on this Earth to dominate the first quarter and a half of prime time football games.
  • Everything after that is anyone’s guess.
  • Like, come on, man
  • One of these days he’ll put together a complete game against a good team and the league will be in trouble. Adding “Mr. T” as an audible call is going to help.
  • Khalil Mack: good
  • Got to check in
  • Suppose there’s not much room for interpretation with the Vikings.
  • I have a problem with this:
  • While it’s appropriate for an NFC North team to co-opt the North’s battlecry fromΒ Game of Thrones, to put this out there when you’re facing one of the few teams that’s farther north than you is stupid. The whole point of the slogan is that the unified North won’t let the southern fancy boys walk all over them. To say “the North Remembers” to a fellow North team (and one that’s even more North than you) is a slap in the face to everything the Starks and Mormonts and Reeds and Umbers (book version, not snake show version) and all the rest stand for. This is officially #bad content, Bears. I’m disappointed in you.

Get hyped for tonight. Everyone’s pre-week 10 Super Bowl preview Chiefs-Rams should be a doozy. And by doozy I mean Chief will win by at least 24.

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