Tuesday Thoughts Week 14

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Awesome week of games. That’s said sarcastically almost 90% of the time, but this week it’s genuine. Some crazy finishes, some randomly exciting games, countless God Friended Me promos, it had it all. And I barely paid attention because my life is now consumed by Super Smash Bros. Ultimate. I will not apologize. I know you’re wondering and Lucina is my main. If I were someone who didn’t care what others thought of me I would confess that Ike is actually my main, but I fear Internet judgement like a medieval peasant fears the wrath of God (think this is the first paragraph in briansden69.com history that included two capital G “Gods”). If you feel like getting decimated (jk I stink) my friend code is SW-6579-4695-6190. Add me if you dare (I swear this isn’t a shameless plea for more friends. I have tons of friends. I have so many friends, in fact, that I never know which ones to hang out with so I just spend most of my time alone). Anyway, what were we talking about? NFL games? Right. As you can tell, life got in the way so it’s a day late. This is the first ever Tuesday Thoughts™.

  • Yeah, the Pats lost on a crazy play when All Pro safety Rob Gronkowski couldn’t make the game-saving tackle. Whatever. Don’t let that distract you from the biggest development from this game: Gronk is back
  • Pats are still going to the Super Bowl don’t @ me.
  • I’m glad the Texans lost. Can’t have a Bill O’Brien coached team win 10 straight.
  • T.Y. Hilton with his biannual massive game
  • Eric Ebron is just Prime Antonio Gates now. This is our new reality
  • This game was boring as shit. I’m sick of the AFC South.
  • At this point I feel bad for Houston. They’ve been through enough lately without having to deal with this:
  • In declaring that Joe Philbin wouldn’t rally the troops, I failed to take the Falcons’ overwhelming badness into account. That’s on me.
  • This Rodgers stat actually caught me off guard. Felt like he’s thrown a ton of picks this year. Guess not.
  • I don’t know why but this picture is killing me
  • It’s like if you took three guys from the 1700s and told them to pose for a photo.
  • Just preposterous
  • Next time someone questions the importance of having someone Belichick or McVay or Harbaugh show them the first 83 seconds of this game.
  • Thanks for showing up, Redskins. Good lord.
  • For one brief moment in time, the Sanchize was Back
  • Nice D, fellas!
  • Glad the Redskins are officially dead finished. Now if we could just get the Giants up outta here…
  • Was Jets-Bills kind of electric or was it just me?
  • You can’t tell me Josh Allen isn’t exciting
  • Hell yes
  • Until ten seconds ago I thought the Bills won. They did not.
  • Panthers STINK. Can’t believe they were ever good.
  • Every Baker completion was an unreal highlight
  • How about Breshad Perriman? Catching passes. In an NFL game, no less.
  • Campfire celly gets a B+.
  • Love a good underneath reverse handoff. Apparently the Browns do, too
  • Christian McCaffrey can keep dominating all he likes, it won’t change the fact that he had an 80 yard run he didn’t score on and submarined the White Skill Guy cause.
  • I’m obsessed with this new Ravens offense. Every single play is a run and no one can really stop it.
  • Shoutout Cyrus Jones for fumbling every time he touched the ball in New England
  • If I’m the Ravens, I’m not sure how I’d feel about losing to a superior team on the road in overtime. Ravens dominated the game and had them right where they wanted them. But not much you can do when this happens
  • It’d be awesome to be Pat Mahomes for a day. Just a day. I’d throw a football through so many solid objects.
  • Justin Houston: still good
  • Chiefs defense is trash for the most part, but do people realize how good Chris “Oops, my huge dick fell out at the combine hope no one sees” Jones is? Guy’s a beast.
  • This pretty much clinched the number one seed for the Chiefs. Oh, well. I’m still betting the AFC Championship is played somewhere other than Kansas City (hint: it’ll be in New England).
  • Saints, like, what the hell are you doing? You forget how to play offense or something?
  • I’m confident this is the worst thing that’s ever happened to 26
  • This game stunk. Jameis finally threw a pick again but it wasn’t even funny. Get the Bucs out of my face.
  • Bengals-Chargers, I mean, did it even happen?
  • Why are all of John Ross’s touchdowns from less than 10 yards out? Where are the bombs?
  • Chargers win 10 games for the first time in a while. This is the ultimate post-hype season (shoutout to everyone old enough to remember when the Chargers were the preseason Super Bowl pick 25 years in a row).
  • George Kittle is good
  • Broncos laid an absolute egg and are dead. Game sucked.
  • The only thing that really caught my attention was play-by-play guy Andrew Catalon being forced to read a promo for God Friended Me, which has to be the second worst show in CBS history after Young Sheldon. There’s just something funny to me about the super serious commentators having to hype up absolutely terrible shows. Like you worked your whole life for this opportunity, the only catch is you have to remind the audience to watch Rules of Engangement in the third quarter.
  • Alright, I admit it- Eagles-Cowboys was an entertaining game.
  • I didn’t know Dak was allowed to get 455 yards passing in one game.
  • Am I crazy or should Amari Cooper finish in the top 10 in MVP voting?
  • Guess the Raiders really really stink, huh?
  • But if the Raiders really really stink, what does that say about the Steelers?
  • If your name is Antonio Brown, please don’t watch this:
  • Big story of this game was Big Ben leaving the game at halftime for…..reasons, being healthy enough to play, then not being put in until late in the fourth, and leading a dramatic touchdown drive. Surely that lead to a Steelers win, no?
  • No.
  • Steelers are in some real trouble. Rough, rough ending schedule and the Ravens are right on their heels. Could the Steelers miss the playoffs? Say it ain’t so!
  • I will not be discussing Lions-C*******s.
  • Sunday night game STUNK, but it proved me right that the Rams are Hollywood soft.
  • Man, Mitch throws some AWFUL passes sometimes
  • You know we’ve gotta check with the graphics department
  • Fitting. Nothing makes me think Corporate America like the the glitzy, high-flying, high-octane team from Los Angeles.
  • Special bonus for everyone: since this is going up on Tuesday, we get to discuss the Monday night game, too!
  • Thus ends the discussion of the Monday night game.

What a week. I’ve got a feeling it’s only going to get better from here. Isn’t the NFL great (sometimes)?

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