Category: Soccer

Premier League 2017-2018 Season Preview

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After a seemingly never-ending offseason (just kidding, the fùtbol offseason is like, three weeks long), the lads are back, ready to take the pitch and knock it into the old onion bag. The pubs are starting to fill with fervent supporters and the children are dancing in the street. This season promises to be a memorable one, and, surprisingly, I've got some opinions on it. Correct opinions, too. I should start by offering some disclosure: I am a Crystal Palace fan supporter. I've been a diehard Palace Head (still workshopping the name) for about three years, now, so you know my loyalty runs deep. I pretty much picked them because I needed a Premier League team and didn't want to just jump on some bandwagon, so I picked the one with the coolest name. I fully expected to never feel true glory and be happy in the lower middle of the Table. After all, I'm allowed to have one team that doesn't win every year, right? Well, Leicester City ruined that two years ago, and now I'm convinced Crystal Palace is taking the league this year. Last season they had horrible luck with injuries and started the season with Allen Pardew as manager. Hard to win with those circumstances. But, we've got a new manager (Frank de Boer), some splashy new signings loans, and some sharp new kits. Things are pointing up! Crystal Palace, 2017-18 Premier League Champions.

Outside the title winner, there are some other storylines this season, as well. Fortunately for someone like me (a football (my football, for all my devoted international readers)-obsessed American who spends the majority of his brainpower in the fall pouring over football stats and highlights like it was my job (sadly, it isn't)(yet) and only devotes a portion of his free time to the Joga Bonito) (But I still know everything about the Premier League and will correctly predict the League Table with astonishing accuracy) (Amazing, I know), literally every relevant plot point and potential narrative revolves around the Big Six: Manchester United, Manchester City, Liverpool, Arsenal, Chelsea, and Tottenham. Forgive me for not going deep on Burnley's transfer window, but, outside the Big Six and Crystal Palace, no other team really has a shot at a Champions League spot. Now, plenty of random teams will be exciting. Probably more exciting than Chelsea, at least. Maybe everyone will be more exciting than Chelsea. Well, everyone except West Brom. But as far as making a real impact? Not so much.

The coveted Transfer Window Championship is, as of now, split between the two Manchester teams clubs. United, again, made sure to have the single biggest singing, finally getting Romelu Lukaku away from Everton. Add in underrated midfielder Nemanja Matic from rival Chelsea and another year for all of last year's huge singings to get acclimated to the Special One's system, and expectations are flying high in Old Trafford. Expectations are always flying high there, though, and that hasn't lead to much of anything (by their standards) recently. City decided to remedy last year's somewhat disappointing third place finish by throwing a ton of money around. They've spent a lot more money than anyone else, and, while they haven't gotten any huge names, everyone they've picked up is relatively young and already really good. Kyle Walker is one of the best right backs in the world, and Bernardo Silva could become a superstar. Chelsea kind of had a head scratching transfer window. They need center backs, but sent two on loan. They need wingers, but sent two on loan. They need another midfielder after puzzlingly letting Matic go, but sent their most promising one on loan (Crystal Palace, bitch!). I don't necessarily think they're done making moves, but just adding Morata, probably losing Costa, and then settling for, what, Danny Drinkwater? I don't know, man. Not really sure what the strategy was Tottenham, the lovable losers who can't seem to win anything despite having the second best team in England the last two years, didn't add anyone. In fact, their only transaction of note was selling Kyle Walker. I guess they have faith in manager Maurico Pochettino and their young, talented core. I'm sure all the Arsenal fans out there are feeling good. They brought in Alexandre Lacazette, the haven't lost anyone yet, they can't choke in the Champions League because they didn't make it, Wenger hasn't lost the locker room yet, everything's going well. Butttttttt, Alexis wants out. Bad. Like, he said he's not going to try this season for Arsenal and leave for free next year. Mesut Özil is always a little flighty. Jack Wilshere and Aaron Ramsay are always popular transfer rumors. The other shoe is going to drop for the gunners, and it's going to drop hard. I know I'm falling into the classic "talk about the Cowboys no matter what" trap we have over here, but Liverpool is probably the most interesting team to me on a philosophical level. Theoretically, I should like them. The same people that own Liverpool own my beloved Red Sox. But I hate the Red Sox owners and all they represent. They haven't won anything in forever, but carry themselves like they've won ten straight titles. Jurgen Klopp turned down $100 million for Philippe Coutinho because he thinks they're in position to win now. How do you turn down $100 million for anyone, let alone someone like Coutinho, who's good, but not that good. And all they added was Mo Salah, a great player, but certainly not enough to singlehandedly change them into world beaters. Look for Liverpool to be walk into another relatively underwhelming season.

Without further ado, it's time to unveil the Official Brian's Den Premier League Table. No, I'm not a licensed psychic, but you can still take my predictions for scripture. I'd even go so far as to suggest using this to place wagers, but we all know I don't condone that sort of thing.

Premier League Table

  1. Crystal Palace
  2. Manchester City
  3. Manchester United
  4. Tottenham
  5. Chelsea
  6. Arsenal
  7. Liverpool
  8. Everton
  9. West Ham
  10. Leicester City
  11. Bournemouth
  12. Southampton
  13. West Brom
  14. Watford
  15. Stoke City
  16. Newcastle United
  17. Burnley
  18. Swansea
  19. Brighton
  20. Huddersfield

Neymar Officially Joins PSG

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source- Neymar said he followed his "heart" after sealing his €222 million move to Paris Saint-Germain from Barcelona. 

Neymar became the world's most expensive player after PSG opted to trigger his buyout clause and told reporters at his unveiling on Friday: "My heart told me that it was time to sign for Paris Saint-Germain."

The 25-year-old enjoyed a successful four-year spell with Barcelona, winning one Champions League title, two La Liga titles and three Copas del Rey as well as one FIFA Club World Cup and one Spanish Super Cup, but he said he was relishing the new challenge.

A source has told ESPN FC that Neymar will be paid around €30m per year after taxes and has been handed a major signing bonus in excess of his net annual sum.

$260 million. Let that sink in. $260 million for one player. The previous record was $123 million. Absolutely mind bending number. After weeks and weeks of leaks, foreplay, non-commitment, denial, and accusations of tampering, Barcelona finally sold Neymar to Paris Saint-Germain for $260 million (or €222 million for the very few non-American fútbol fans out there). From PSG's standpoint, why the hell not? They've got unlimited funds thanks to that sweet, delicious oil money, and you've go to do something to shake off the "perennial Champions League chokers" stink, and not winning the French League last season was probably pretty embarrassing for one of the richest teams in the world. For Barthelona, it's not like they need the money or anything, but it's pretty hard to turn down $260 million for one guy regardless of how good they are, especially if the player seems pretty determined to leave. Hurts to lose someone of Neymar's caliber, but something tells me they'll be okay in the long run.

It's pretty hard to miss the obvious parallels between this and the Kyrie Irving situation in Cleveland. Neymar is better at soccer than Kyrie is at basketball, but the fact remains: supremely talented individual on a team with an even more supremely talented individual that has had success and won wants to move out of the shadow of the transcendent mega-star and prove they can do it on their own. I mean, if you're Neymar, I don't really see the downside, here. You know that, as long as he's still playing (and probably long after he retires), Messi will always be king. Everything will always be compared to Messi, and even if you someone elevate your game to the alien plane of existence Messi occupied, he's so beloved you'll never measure up. Why would you even bother? You've already won every trophy there is to win at Barcelona, go to the French League, score 50 goals a season, win the league every year, make $35 million or whatever it is a year, and just have fun. I have zero issue with it, just like I have zero issue with Kyrie wanting his own squad. I don't really have my finger on the pulse of the Spanish media market, but if they operate like the NBA fans here, I'm sure Neymar's getting roasted left and right. "Where's the loyalty?" "Why would you want to leave Barcelona?" He's just doing it for money/stats!" It's just so stupid. So you're not allowed to choose to join a "super team," but now you're not allowed to leave, either? What? As I've said countless times before, players are people, too. They're allowed to make decisions. And Neymar decided he didn't want to come in second to Messi for the rest of his life. He wanted to prove he could carry a team as The Guy. Since when is that something we frown on?

Brazilian Soccer Team Sport Clube Gaucho Involved in Nasty Masturbation Scandal

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source– A Brazilian football club has been forced to sack four of its players after they were involved in a masturbation scandal.

Sport Clube Gaucho rescinded the contracts after a video emerged of three players mutually masturbating in the club’s change rooms, while a fourth filmed the act.

Unfortunately for the players, the video went viral and club president, Gilmar Rosso, sacked them on the spot.

“When I hit play, I deleted it, I think it’s disgusting,” Rosso told GloboEsporte.

“Outside business hours, we have nothing to do with the situation. If they want to get drunk, (be) gay or not, that’s their problem.

“What I have to answer as president is during a trip, office hours. That’s my responsibility.

“The club is not a keeper of morals and good manners. The only thing we have to answer to is the making of the video inside the club dressing room.”

Well, this isn’t good. Not good at all. Here I was thinking the Brazilian soccer league was a safe haven where people could be themselves, but I guess not. Put yourself in the players’ shoes for a second. One minute you’re hanging out with the boys in the locker room, choppin’ it up, shootin’ the shit, yankin’ your chain while someone films it, then the next minute you’re out on the street after the owner watches two seconds of the video? Talk about a kangaroo court. I can tell this team has never won anything if the owner so willingly discounts team chemistry like this. Or he just doesn’t have any friends. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been chilling with the guys and it somehow ended in a videotaped group jerk session. It’s just the kind of things that happen when the bros get together.

Honestly the biggest mistake these guys made was thinking they could get away with this in a third world country. I don’t really know how Brazil usually handles this stuff, but if they’re like literally every single non European/North American country in the world, they probably weren’t super stoked to see three dudes jacking off together on camera. Did they not consider the public’s reaction before filming? Or were they betrayed by the camera man? Either way I don’t really blame the owner for cutting bait. I don’t really want to pay someone who’s dumb enough to jerk off on camera with a couple other guys in a country that barely has running water. It’s a bummer that they can’t follow their natural guy instincts, but thems the breaks. Blessed with pro soccer ability, cursed to have it in a country that discourages circle jerks.

What the Hell is Going on at Real Madrid?

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So this has been going on for a little while now, but it’s too weird and too crazy not to address. Apparently literally everyone who has ever been involved with La Liga in Spain is being investigated for tax fraud. Cristiano Ronaldo. Angel Di Maria. Jose Mourinho. Alexis Sanchez. Lionel Messi’s case is finally starting to wrap up after about a year. Soccer players in Spain just refuse to pay taxes. And I don’t blame them. Taxes stink. But most governments say that you have to pay them if you want to live in their country.

Now, I’m not naïve. I went to a college with big time athletics, I know how this arrangement works. We (the normal folk) do something the athletes don’t want to do (homework, taxes), and, in turn, we get to live vicariously through the athletes as they excel on the field. It’s a win-win scenario. The only people that have a problem with it could easily be classified as haters and losers. I’d love to meet the goody two-shoes who blew the whistle on Ronaldo. Like, good job guy. Now Ronaldo is desperate to leave the country to escape massive tax fraud allegations. Way to go. I guarantee everyone in the Spanish government was well aware of the fact that Messi hadn’t paid taxes in years and was perfectly fine with it. But the second some self-righteous justice warrior decides to point it out, their hands are tied. There’s going to be a lot of “jail time turned into paying a small fine” sentences going around as the government tries to smooth over relations with their star players. I’ve got some advice for whoever called this in: you’d better leave the country, fake your own death, get an entirely new identity, and leave your life behind entirely. Because if Ronaldo does, in fact, leave, once the Ronaldo fans find out who you are, it’s over. Forget a closed casket, you won’t even have a funeral because your body will be nowhere to be found. No one will even know you’re dead. Those Ronaldo fans are vicious, and they’re coming for you. Right after this siesta.

Champions League Final Preview

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Man, the NBA thinks the Champions League has a long wait before the final. College football considers the gap between semi-final and final excessive. It feels like it’s been a year since some Champions League footy was last played. I almost forgot to do this preview, it’s been so long. But, we finally made it to the final. The game match to end all matches. What better place to celebrate the game than historic Cardiff, home of all the world’s greatest clubs? None that I can think of. Luckily, as an American, I haven’t been subjected to countless talk about how this game will affect Ronaldo’s legacy. Everyone’s been too busy debating LeBron’s legacy for that. So, freed from the weightiness of history, I can sit back and enjoy what’s sure to be an epic clash.

This is kind of like Juventus’ semi-final matchup, only if Monaco suddenly switched to Amateur difficulty level. It’s a similar offense vs. defense clash, but Real Madrid is in a different class offensively than anyone in the world save Barcelona. Ronaldo is truly the LeBron of soccer-he’s still great, and, by changing with both the game and his own physical “limitations,” somehow getting better. He’s surrounded by an absurd collection of attacking talent: Benzema, Isco, Kroos, Modric, Marcelo. Gareth Bale, even if he’s healthy, might come off the bench! This team can beat you any way they choose, and if Juventus’ (gracefully) aging defense can’t keep up, this’ll be over fast (that’s why they call me a Soccer Expert, folks). But, isn’t that what they (me) said last round? Yeah, the defense is old. But it’s still the best in the world. The Barzagli-Bonucci-Chiellini triumvirate just shut down a Monaco team that is just as fast (if not faster) than Madrid. Gigi Buffon may have discovered the actual Fountain of Youth. And Juventus isn’t trotting out the expansion Buccaneers, either. They can score, and score quickly. Considering Pepe is still injured for Real, if they’re shaky at all in the back Juventus could put two or three on them in the blink of an eye. Dybala and Higuain are a deadly one-two punch.

In situations like this, I’ll usually pick the team I think can control the midfield. All the scoring and defending in the world is great, but if you get dominated in the middle, it doesn’t mean a whole lot. That’s why I’m leaning Real. I wouldn’t be surprised if this became a blowout either way, but I do think it’ll come down to the wire. Will it be penalties again? Well, that depends on if Ronaldo’s having a good ab day or not. Juventus better make sure a ton of McDonald’s magically makes its way to his hotel room, because if those things are poppin’ and glistenin’ in the Welsh twilight, you know his shirt is getting ripped off at least once in celebration.

Prediction: Real Madrid Wins (But Juventus at even odds looks pretty good)

Champions League Semifinal Preview

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The Champions League keeps rolling on and I keep being right about everything (I said Barcelona would struggle which is as good as saying they’d lose). To answer your question, no, it does not get exhausting. We’re down to four teams. Only the elite remain. Both semifinals are intriguing clashes of styles, and whoever can impose their will will find themselves in Cardiff June 3rd.

Real Madrid vs. Atletico Madrid

For what feels like the first time in forever, we’ve got an all-Madrid matchup late in the Champions League. Now, it’s probably become fairly clear that I am not, in fact, a fútbol “expert,” but I am a sports expert, and I’ve seen this scenario play out a million times. Little Brother just can’t beat Big Brother. This is the fourth straight year they’ve played each other in the Champions League. Real Madrid has won every time. Until they can actually beat their cross-town rivals in the Champions League, I see no reason to pick Atletico. They’re like soccer’s version of the Memphis Grizzlies: it’s all grit and grind, ugly, physical, and defensive. Their entire persona is about being smarter and tougher than the opposition to make up for usually having less talent. The only problem is, when three of their more important players are fighting injuries (Juanfran, Sime Vrsaljko, Yannick Carrasco), the task gets even tougher. Real’s high powered attack is firing on all cylinders (last week’s last-second loss to Messi notwithstanding) and is so deep they can easily plug the holes left by Pepe and Gareth Bale’s absences. Add in the serious mental edge Real has and I see only one winner here. It’ll be low scoring and it’ll come down to the end, but, like always, Real will prevail.

(Side Note: We’re approaching my favorite non-international tournament part of the year-round soccer schedule- transfer rumors season. The closer we get to the transfer window, the more often stupid and outlandish headlines come out. I keep getting notifications about how a team (usually Man U, Chelsea, or Arsenal) really wants someone like Antoine Greizmann and is willing to spend x amount of money. Oh, really? Would they also like Lionel Messi or Cristiano Ronaldo? Or it’ll be something like Crystal Palace has a top striker, a top winger, a top midfielder, and a top defender on its wish list. Wow, no way. Really hard hitting stuff. I want to see a rumor that says a team doesn’t want anyone. Or that they aren’t willing to spend $100 million on one guy. At least it’d be different.)

Real Advances

AS Monaco vs. Juventus

A tale as old as time. One of the best offensive teams in the world vs. the best defensive team in the world. A team lead by youngsters and a veteran who found new life against a team of a bunch of old guys. Speed vs. strength. Athleticism vs. guile. Youth vs. experience. Unfortunately for me, the defensive minded, experienced team usually wins, especially if it’s the young team’s first time going so far in a tournament. Juventus could easily stifle and frustrate Monaco, rendering the Greatest Show on Pitch toothless and punchless. But, as mentioned before, Juventus is really old. At some point, Father Time might come for Buffon and the boys. Maybe it happens now, and Monaco runs them off the field. But that’s doubtful. Buffon, Bonucci, Chiellini, and Barzagli have shown absolutely no sign of slowing down any time soon. If they’re allowed to be as physical as they like (i.e., holding and fouling everyone, then looking at the ref with abject shock that people fall over when you trip them and promising retribution for daring to blow the whistle) I think Juventus should make it through fairly easily.

Juventus Advances

Champions League Quarter Finals Start Today

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Are you ready for some fútbol? I hope so, because there’s some great games these next couple weeks as the Quarter Finals of the Champions League start today. Only eight teams remain, and since they’re all big names, my lack of soccer knowledge is easier to hide. Who will be left standing? Who will lose in shocking fashion? Let’s look at the match-ups and see.

juventus_logo142px-fc_barcelona_28crest29-svgJuventus vs. Barcelona

While I exulted in Barcelona’s stunning comeback against PSG (mostly just because it showed I was right about PSG and I could dunk on the h8trs), it left me a little less concrete in my thinking that Barcelona was going to win the title by default. After all, they did need to pull off the greatest comeback in Champions League history to do so. Their defense isn’t particularly good, especially since they’re dealing with injuries and a suspension to Sergio Busquets. Juventus still has the best back line in the world, and if they can somewhat neutralize the ungodly Messi-Neymar-Suarez trio Barcelona might be in a bit of trouble. They may even lose. But, comebacks like that last more than just one round. Barcelona wins, but they won’t feel great about themselves.

Barcelona Advances

220px-borussia_dortmund_logo-svgBorussia Dortmund vs. AS Monaco1200px-as_monaco_fc-svg
Now this is the one I want to watch. This is going to be the most exciting, high octane matchup in the QF. Both teams may even score! Monaco is the second highest scoring team in Europe behind Barcelona and Dortmund has one of the fastest teams in the world. Those two things go well together. As usual, Monaco has a million great young players that probably won’t be there for long (I stand by my original stance that, were I a top-level professional soccer player, Monaco is the only team I’d want to play for. Why does anyone leave? You play in one of the most beautiful places on Earth, you don’t pay taxes, and Monaco is a total fantasy world. Anything you want will be given to you. Sounds like somewhere I’d want to be). Dortmund, well, just watch this. If you haven’t heard of him by now, (do you live under a rock?) Christian Pulisic is the Next Great American Soccer Star. If he really works hard, he may even be as good as Freddy Adu one day. As a diehard Crystal Palace fan of about two years, I’m getting used to picking a new team to root for in the Champions League. I know it took a while, but I’m ready to commit myself to whoever wins this fixture.

Monaco Advances

800px-atletico_madrid_logo-svg 400px-leicester_city_crest-svgAtlètico Madrid vs. Leicester City

At some point, this run has to end. They’ve been punching above their weight for way too long. They’ve been sticking it to the bigger clubs left and right and embarrassing the established powers in their league. They’ve come out of nowhere, building a contender with a series of smart pickups and excellent player development. Teams like this aren’t supposed to be able to compete with teams like Real Madrid and Manchester United. I’m speaking, of course, about Atlètico Madrid. All of a sudden they’re one of the best, most consistent teams in the world. They make at least the semi finals of the Champions League every year. They’ve come within inches of the title twice, and this year they might even win it. I’m getting a little sick of Leicester, and it’s about time their carriage turned back into a pumpkin.

Atlètico Advances

480px-logo_fc_bayern_munchen-svgBayern Munich vs. Real Madrid143px-real_madrid_cf-svg

This is really concerning. These are probably the two most complete teams in the world. Both would be heavy favorites against any other of these teams. Both think they should win the title. And they’re meeting in the quarter finals? While teams like Leicester and Monaco are still around to be sacrificed? How did UEFA let this happen? You used to be able to count on soccer and the Olympics to always openly rig things to get the results they wanted. But ever since the big Sepp Blatter bust soccer is trying to act all “clean.” Come on, man. Without Stern the NBA is on the straight and narrow. Baseball is too hard to influence and football is too married to the idea of parity to ever fix games. I need some shadiness in my sports. Soccer used to be a safe place for me, but now they’ve cast me out into the cold because they want to seem “fair” and “just.” Give me a break! People in Africa set up fake games, have people bet on them, cancel the games, and don’t refund people all the time! You’re telling me you’re above board now? Get over yourselves and somehow make it so both of these teams advance.

Real Advances

Barcelona overcomes biggest deficit ever to advance in Champions League

2017 must be the year for comebacks. First the Pats, now Barcelona. They were dead in the water after the first leg. Down 4-0. No spark whatsoever. I had a giant egg on my face for my proclamation that PSG was trash and had no shot. I was even taking heat in the comments section:

Surely PSG would just see it out until the end, no? Wait, what happened?

Huh?!?!? They won? Yet another prediction came up the Brian’s Den way? Well, color me surprised.

Listen, it doesn’t matter the sport, some teams are just losers. It’s in their DNA. They may be flashy, put up big stats, dominate the lesser competition, but when it comes time to play the big boys, they always, always falter. The NBA has the Suns and Clippers. The NFL has the Falcons and Bills. The MLB has the Cubs Indians and Rays. And soccer has PSG/Arsenal (who predictably got massacred). It’s not the players’ faults, necessarily. With all these types of teams, the specific roster doesn’t really matter. Michael Jordan could have suited up for the Suns in 1996 and not they still wouldn’t have won anything. PSG is just a loser team. Having Cavani doesn’t really help things, but this was just destined to happen. Barcelona has the greatest front line ever put together. They weren’t going to lose to PSG in the round of 16. It was like a mirror image of the Super Bowl. The Falcons were never going to beat the Pats. Cavani’s goal was like Julio Jones’ catch. A sigh of relief against the relentless tide, but then they still blow it anyway. It’s unbelievable but at the same time very believable. Barcelona is winning the Champions League now, no doubt about it. They were always going to win it, but this comeback only seals it. Put your life savings on them.

A more important development is that I’m officially the football Nostradamus. Doesn’t matter what country the game is being played in, I’ve already foreseen the ending. It’s not my fault I don’t see crazy comebacks coming. I just know the end result. I think any sane person would now double down on all my predictions for the other Champions League fixtures and the future games. At least, anyone who enjoys being right.

Champions League Knockout Round starts today

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Weren’t expecting this, were you? That’s right, your boy knows soccer, and today is a pretty monumental day in the fùtbol world. The knockout stage of the Champions League kicks off today, and I, for one, am very excited. Over the next month, there’s gonna be some great games, including the shiniest matchup of all: Barcelona vs. PSG.

In an odd twist, the pairings seem to be somewhat randomly created, which is a huge departure from the typical soccer style. Barcelona has to face PSG when there are teams like Leicester, Porto, and Bayer Leverkusen left? Huh? And Real Madrid is facing Napoli, the highest scoring team in Italy, instead of perennial losers Arsenal? What’s going on here? Someone call up Sepp Blatter and have him fix these matchups.

In another shocking turn of events, the Premier League is probably going to be finished at the end of this round. Again. At what point does the title of “The Best League in the World” get called into question? Judging by the fact that the other best teams in the world routinely leave the Premiership for dead, that time should come soon. I mean, Arsenal might have a chance if Bayern pulls an Arsenal and collapses mentally. This year’s Leicester, unfortunately, doesn’t really have a chance against Sevilla, who is an unlikely 3rd in La Liga this year. And Man City, always the shining beacon of hope for the Premier league, is facing a scalding hot Monaco (side note: if I was a pro soccer player, the only team I’m playing for is Monaco. Why be just another cog in the Barcelona/Real/Man United machine? Let me live out my days in the closest thing on Earth to paradise (beautiful coast, no taxes, legendary casinos) and just be a legend there. Not sure why they don’t get more huge names). Honestly, I don’t see any of the three advancing.

As for the rest of the matchups, I’ve got Real over Napoli, Benfica over Dortmund, Atletico Madrid over Bayer Leverkusen, and Juventus over Porto. Can PSG beat Barcelona???? Umm, no. No they can’t. Barcelona doesn’t lose. Last time I checked, Messi isn’t wearing an Argentina jersey kit, which means he’s about to dominate. I don’t really know how other people feel about them since I’m not exactly plugged in to the soccer insiders (although I was a prodigy in 4th grade), but I think PSG stinks. Edinson Cavani is complete trash and the rest of their team is so blah. I think they’ll get run off the field by Barcelona.

So there you have it. Am I a soccer genius, or do I only have a gift for American football? Does anyone besides me even care about o jogo bonito? Should I just stick to Burning Questions stop trying to force my interests on people? Only time will tell.