Author: Brian

Ahhhh, what a season. Can you feel it? Can you smell it? Can you hear it? The wind whistling through the autumn foliage. The crunch of the fallen leaves underfoot. The snap of crisp apples. The warm, nostalgic aromas of cinnamon and nutmeg. The over-saturation of pumpkin flavored food items. It’s playoff baseball SZN, and I couldn’t be happier. Well, happy might not be the right word. I don’t think baseball will give me any lasting happiness until the Red Sox win the World Series. Watching playoff baseball when your team is involved is like getting a thousand tiny needles jammed into you every second. Each pitch could be the one that breaks your back or finally gives you some release on the tension that’s been building inside of you for four hours. If you can, I recommend setting up a TV or streaming the game in the bathroom, because when the starting pitcher loads the bases with no outs in the third inning and gets pulled, your nerves are probably going to be running pretty high and your sphincter pretty tight. You can try to calm yourself by drinking or eating a bunch of pizza or wings or something, but personally I get too nervous to ingest anything. I’d say a playoff baseball game is pretty much an extended version of the fourth quarter of the Super Bowl. Oh, what’s that? 90% don’t know what it’s like to have your team play in and win multiple Super Bowls? Wow. Bad analogy, then. Anyway, playoff baseball is a terrible ordeal to go through, but I wouldn’t change anything about it. Because if your team pulls through in a 2-1 grind or wins a series or somehow wins the World Series, there’s no better feeling in the world. With that setup, it’s time to get to the preview. Now, I make fun of Hockey Guys for saying this exact thing during the Stanley Cup Playoffs, but since this is baseball and I’m a Baseball Guy, it’s okay when I say it: literally anything can happen in the playoffs. Individual baseball games are the least consequential pieces of data in sports, and even in a seven game series, let alone the five game Division series, the best team doesn’t really always win. So much of what determines the results of playoff baseball games is all luck or chance: a random error by a usually sure-handed fielder, an 8th inning home run by the backup catcher with a career .583 OPS, a Cy Young-caliber pitcher starts walking a bunch of guys and giving up homers. It’s such an easy and unquantifiable thing to say, but the game really does come down to mental toughness and “cluchness,” which means that no one knows what’s going to happen and it’s virtually impossible to say who’s going to win. That’s never stopped me from trying, though.

Boston Red Sox vs. Houston Astros

The last time I wrote about the Red Sox, I was saying they might be able to make a deep run because they were so under-the-radar. Well, that was all based on the clearly absurd notion that the Red Sox would actually finish the season playing well. How foolish of me. Much like a child who doesn’t want to eat their vegetables, the Sox had to be forced to win the division or risk going to bed early without dessert. They begrudgingly took care of business, but they’ll be damned if they give any more effort than is absolutely necessary to play a baseball game. It’s stupid to say a ten game stretch was enough to get me off the Red Sox bandwagon that I’ve been on since the say I was born, but this year’s team was so weird and I don’t trust them at all. If Chris Sale can’t win today, it’ll be a sweep. I appreciate the early start time this afternoon, because it’ll free me up to watch one of my teams that actually is going to win the championship this year (btw, I looooooooooooooooooooooove Pats -6. You may never hear from me again I’ll be so rich after tonight). Astros are good but not in an intimidating way, so if things go 100% right the Sox will still win, I just know they won’t. Still, I won’t be on the wrong side of history should things go in my favor.

Red Sox in 4

New York Yankees vs. Cleveland Indians

Nothing would make me happier than an Indians curb stomp, but I think we all know that’s probably not going to happen. As you might have heard, the Yankees are Back, despite this being a rebuilding year. What that means is that Yankee fans are in perfect position to be the ultimate versions of themselves. If they go on a run and possibly win it all, they get to tell everyone to kiss the rings (that they won when there were 4 teams and no black players) and remind everyone that they weren’t even supposed to be good this year, so who knows how many consecutive championships they’ll win. If the Indians beat them, they can still call for wholesale change, forgetting their favorite line all year, “we weren’t even supposed to be good this year.” It’s a can’t lose situation for the typical obnoxious Yankee fan, so, in that regard, we’ve all already lost. On the field, they’re actually pretty similar teams, with deep, explosive lineups and great bullpens. However, whatever it really means in today’s game, the Indians have more good starting pitching. Severino might as well just not show up anymore, leaving the Yanks with whatever version of Tanaka they get, Sonny Gray, and the reanimated corpse of CC Sabathia. Not great. All realistic signs point to the Indians, which means only one thing.

Yankees in 5

Chicago Cubs vs. Washington Nationals

Love the Cubs this year. All the historical angst is gone, and, for some unfathomable reason, there’s absolutely no pressure on the defending champ in a massive market. Literally no one is talking about them, and they’re just as great as last year. I’ll die before I predict playoff success for a D.C. team.

Cubs in 4

Arizona Diamondbacks vs. Los Angeles Dodgers

Too bad the Rockies didn’t win to break up this run of red and blue teams. I’m super conflicted about this series, because on one hand, I would love to see Kershaw finally start dominating the playoffs and blowing fools away. If he won a World Series while pitching at his historic level and shoved it in all the h8rz faces, I’d be so happy. But on the other hand, this DBacks team is awesome. I’m all in on the Great J.D. Martinez Contract Hunt of 2017, and I’ve got a feeling Goldschmidt is going to make me regret dismissing his MVP chances. Their pitching is good on paper but not good enough to keep any game from getting interesting late, meaning all of these games are going to last 6 hours. Everyone else will bail and complain about how long they are, but I bask in the glow of pitching changes, bad defensive plays, home runs, and mental breakdowns (as long as it’s not the Red Sox). I’m actually excited to watch both National League series, something I can’t say about the American League, and this one promises to be the most exciting. Or a Dodgers sweep. But, since I think I want the DBacks to win because it’d be more fun, I’m thinking the latter.

Dodgers in 4

The Division Series round seems like it last two seconds. If you’re not 100% plugged in, you can easily miss games, developments, big moments, and meltdowns. But luckily for you, I don’t miss anything, so I’ll be here to break down everything. Every mistake, every clutch home run, every time someone Earns Their Pinstripes, everything. Nothing quite like playoff baseball, folks.

Seems like only yesterday that I was previewing every division in anticipation for the coming baseball season, and yet here we are at the end. It was a crazy season full of streaks and slides, absurd individual performances (good and bad), and plenty of hot takes to go around. If your team didn’t make the playoffs (can’t relate), don’t be sad the season’s over, smile because it happened (unless you’re a Mets, Padres, Giants, Tigers, Blue Jays, Braves, Phillies, Rangers, A’s, Marin- actually, you probably should just be sad if your team didn’t make the playoffs). If your team is in, hope you had your annual colonoscopy because your butthole is going to be uncomfortably tight for the next month. Believe me, snacking during games helps (bonus, completely out-of-nowhere Chip Power Rankings: 1. Cape Cod Dark Russet 2. Ruffles All Dressed 3. Doritos Spicy Nacho 3. Cape Cod Salt and Vinegar 5. Santitas Tortilla Chips). I’ll get into the playoff experience later when I do a full playoff preview, but I’d rather have my team miss the playoffs than have to play in the wildcard game, and, if they aren’t going to win the World Series, I want them to lose ASAP. Being emotionally invested in 10-20 playoff baseball games only to not come out on top is one of the worst feelings of all time. On a related note, I’m sure you’re all looking for my wildcard picks, but predicting the outcomes of single baseball games in a winner-take-all atmosphere is virtually impossible, so I’ll just say I’d be awfully surprised if the Yankees or DBacks lost. Anyway, time to get on the the Official Brian’s Den 2017 MLB Awards, which are sure to perfectly reflect the actual awards whenever they finally get handed out. I’m dedicating this to the memory of Tom Petty, one of the five most influential American musicians ever, the greatest road trip artist of all time, and the perfect soundtrack to any baseball discussion.

ROOKIE OF THE YEAR

American League– Aaron Judge, New York Yankees

I think we can all agree on this one, no?

Apologies to: Andrew Benintendi

National League– Cody Bellinger, Los Angeles Dodgers

Boy, this is easy!

Apologies to: Rhys Hoskins

MANAGER OF THE YEAR

American League– Terry Francona, Cleveland Indians

Listen, I’ve never been one to hide my biases, and Tito is my guy for life for his time with the Red Sox, but homerism doesn’t factor in, here. When you win 22 straight games with two of your three best position players out, coax a league-leading ERA out of a pitching staff that was hit with injuries all season long, and generally improved a team that was one inning away from winning the World Series last year, you get my vote. Actually, homerism probably does play a factor, because Paul Molitor of the Twins has a strong case, and is probably going to win the actual award because, when it comes to Coach of the Year awards in literally any sport, voters always take the easy way out and just give it to whoever lead a team that was supposed to be shitty to a good record (Molitor is actually a good manager, though, and does deserve to win).

Apologies to: Paul Molitor

National League– Torey Lovullo, Arizona Diamondbacks

All these great baseball minds to come through the Red Sox organization in the last few years, and we’re stuck with John Farrell? Why? I know I just kind of bashed the thought process that having an unexpected winning season is enough to win Coach of the Year, but Lovullo didn’t take a group of young guys who were going to be good anyway to the top or completely revamp the roster and bring in his guys. At the start of the season, the DBacks had pretty much the exact same team as last year, when they were terrible. Literally the only change they made was adding J.D. Martinez midseason, and, by then, they were already in position to make the playoffs, anyway. So clearly Lovullo was doing something right. They had better injury luck, sure, but he also managed the lineups, bullpen, and personalities of the team better than anyone in the National League. Baseball is a mental game more than anything, and he turned a team full of head cases and malcontents into a legitimate title contender.

Apologies to: Dave Roberts, Bud Black

CY YOUNG

American League– Corey Kluber, Cleveland Indians

Sigh. At the All Star break, I really thought I’d be sitting here talking about Chris Sale’s unbelievable dominance and how it was the greatest trade of all time, but, in good faith, I can’t give it to anyone but Kluber. Hot take, saying the guy who lead baseball in ERA and WHIP and was third in strikeouts should win Cy Young, I know. The narrative you’ll hear about this was that Sale faded down the stretch while Kluber surged, but that’s not necessarily accurate. His second half ERA (3.12) wasn’t that much higher than his first half ERA (2.75), and his WHIP and opponents’ slash lines were higher, but not that much higher. He actually struck people out at a higher rate in the second half than the first. It’s just that, while Sale was seemingly alternating between giving up five runs and zero, Kluber was giving up nothing every time out. He was excellent in the first half, and then became otherworldly in the second, posting an 11-1 record with a 1.79 ERA, 142 strikeouts, and 12 (!!!) walks over 110 innings. Those are decent numbers. It doesn’t factor in, but Kluber’s got a air of invincibility about him right now that no American League pitcher has.

Apologies to: Chris Sale

National League– Max Scherzer, Washington Nationals

It was reeeeeeeeeeeeallly tempting to say Kershaw, but I’m a big durability guy, and, because Dusty Baker would throw him out there for 8 innings if both his arms literally fell off his body, I’ll take the guy who still had unreal numbers and didn’t miss (much) time. He’s been a strikeout beast ever since he came into the league, and he just keeps improving on his ERA, ERA+, and WHIP every year. He allowed the fewest hits per 9 innings since Pedro Martinez in 2000, who wasn’t even really human. He slowed down juuuuuust a bit late, but that’ll happen when you’re a little banged up and forced to pitch anyway. The only problem he might run in to is that he has two teammates that could draw votes from him.

Apologies to: Clayton Kershaw, Gio Gonzalez, Steven Strasburg, Robbie Ray

MOST VALUABLE PLAYER

National League– Giancarlo Stanton, Miami Marlins

Switching up the league order here, and for good reason, as you’ll soon discover. This is the closest race out of all the awards, and at least five guys have legitimate claims. First off, I know I’ve established this before, but team success should have absolutely no impact on MVP voting. None. It’s icing on the cake, not the cake itself. One man can only effect 162 baseball games so much. There’s too many variables, too many things outside of anyone’s control, just too many weird things that happen during the course of a full season to say that a guy with 50+ homers or a league-leading on-base percentage and OPS actually wasn’t good because their teams stunk. With that out of the way, I’m all in on Giancarlo. His supernova hot-streak was the most fun couple weeks of the season, and his pursuit of 60 homers became the most interesting subplot in the National League. If you want to throw out team success, the Marlins briefly flirted with a possible wildcard spot, and it was solely because of Stanton. He had 33 home runs after the All Star break, and was pretty much unstoppable all season. He was a feel-good story for a franchise desperate for some good energy (even though he’s probably getting traded this offseason), and hits the most aesthetically-pleasing home runs this side of New York City. I would also listen to cases for Joey Votto, the most under-appreciated future Hall of Famer ever who just painted his masterpiece of plate control, or Nolan Arenado, the most complete blend of elite offense and defense in the league.

Apologies to: Joey Votto, Nolan Arenado, Paul Goldschmidt, Charley Blackmon, J.D. Martinez

Cross-League– J.D. Martinez, Detroit Tigers/Arizona Diamondbacks

I just wanted to create this award to recognize J.D. Martinez a bit. Do people realize what kind of season he had? He was third in MLB in home runs while playing in 119 games! He hit a home run every 9.6 at bats. Stanton? 10.1. Cody Bellinger, who finished 10th in the league in slugging percentage, is closer to Giancarlo Stanton, number 2, than Stanton is to Martinez’s unreal .690 slugging, the highest since someone named Barry Bonds was playing. He tied the record for most home runs ever hit in September. He has a real case to be National League MVP despite playing 62 games in Arizona. There’s never been a better case for Contract Year Magic, and because MLB doesn’t have any kind of First Team All MLB or anything, the only thing J.D. will get out of this absurd season is a big fat new contract.

American League– Jose Altuve, Houston Astros

As I said in the Cy Young section, I’m a big fan of durability, and, by proxy, consistency. That’s really the only thing separating Altuve from Aaron Judge. Normally, one valley in a long season full of peaks wouldn’t be enough to sway an MVP vote, but when the valley is as low as the one Judge went through right after the All Star break, it’s hard to ignore. There was about a month and a half where Judge was legitimately one of the worst players in baseball. He hit .185 in August, for crying out loud! Altuve was great all season. Sure he doesn’t have the flashy power numbers, but don’t let that distract you from his all-around game. Whatever batting average actually means these days, Altuve lead the league in it and hit .485 in July. .485! He added a .410 on base, .547 slugging, and 24 home runs, all pretty atypical for 5’6″ second basemen. He stole 32 bases, and is in general a better baserunner than Judge. Judge isn’t a bad fielder by any means, but there’s a reason you put the kid that picks daisies in right field. Altuve plays a premium defensive position and plays it well. He the most well rounder player in the American League, and has been all season. And, yes, the Astros won 100 games.

Apologies to: Aaron Judge, Corey Kluber