Aye, aye, aye, aye, aye, I can’t believe how awesome it was.
Aye, aye, aye, aye, aye, I can’t believe how awesome it was.
The (very) few of you from the beginning remember that this site was founded to honor the memory of George Michael. He’s the patron saint of the Brian’s Den, if you will. Today marks the three month anniversary of his tragic decision to give his heart away for good and join the the ranks of the Angelic Pop Duos of Heaven. I’m still picking up the pieces of my life, but I like to think he’s looking down on me every step of the way. I mean, think of all the great things that have happened since Last Christmas: the Pats win the Super Bowl, Yu-Gi-Oh!, John Wick 2, The Great Wall, Logan, and Beauty and the Beast came out, Tom Brady’s jersey was found, McDonald’s introduced chocolate Shamrock Shakes, chocolate covered strawberry Oreos, I introduced the world to Harry, Pie Tops, Lavar Ball came into the American conscious, the heat shield on my car fell off, I did my taxes, the Celtics didn’t trade for Jimmy Butler, the Oscars had the most legendary (staged?) live TV moment of all time, the Naked Chicken Chalupa changed my life forever, my birthday, and I got a new sweatshirt I really like. And that’s hardly everything. What a run. And all thanks to the spirit of Yog. His raw vocal power and sultry tones have been guiding my life from afar all this time. Needless to say his indomitable showmanship pumps through my veins. It seems only right to take a trip into the Great Beyond and pay tribute to our hero once more.
(So no one ever considered that he might be gay? Really? The 80s, man.)
All this remembrance has me in a reflective mood, and I need to do something unprecedented: I have to change one of my takes. Everyone who follows the Brian’s Den Facebook (don’t be afraid to give it a like) page may have seen that I implied that the original 1991 Beauty and the Beast was better than the remake. Well, after firing off my review, I went back and watched the cartoon for the first time in a few years. And, I must confess: I think I actually like the remake better. And not just because I may or may not be in love with Emma Watson. They added in a few new songs and all of them are money. That song Beast sang as he (spoiler alert for everyone who somehow hasn’t seen any version of one of the most beloved romances of all time) watched Belle ride away was some poetic and heart-wrenching stuff. Turning LeFou gay caused a stir on the internet, but he was already gay in the original so I don’t see what the big deal was. Either way, I’m glad Josh Gad sold his soul to Disney because he was delightful, as was the always great Luke Evans. And I kind of think this version of the servants were better, too. The castle was so beautiful. I’m rambling, but the bottom line is that I held the original as an unassailable classic in my mind, and I liked this new one more. So, for the first time (and I swear on the fate of my immortal soul the last time) I’m going to change my rating. From here on out, Beauty and the Beast will be rated 🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀🥀. I don’t feel great about wavering like this, but I can’t in good conscience leave it as it was.
So, uhhh, how about those sport games last night?
So last night was the final of the 2017 World Baseball Classic. The United States crushed Puerto Rico 8-0 (wouldn’t USA have technically won either way?), behind a dominant outing from starting pitcher Marcus Stroman (who, full disclosure, I don’t think is very good). It was an exciting game, if only for the fact that the United States finally won their first WBC in the fourth edition of the tournament.
I just hope this leads to more of the top players actually playing. I mean, there’s no reason it should have taken four tries to win the title. Take a look at this year’s roster:
Now, obviously that’s a strong roster seeing as how it just won the World Baseball Classic (still needs a better name). It’s the best roster we’ve ever thrown out there. But that’s hardly the best we can do. Let’s tweak this a little and make the best American roster possible, adding in guys like Mike Trout and Clayton Kershaw (are they any good?) and taking out Eric Hosmer (who continues to be the most severely and mysteriously overrated player maybe ever) and Ian Kinsler (who is deserving of a spot, but we can’t have anyone from baseball’s Unwritten Rules Gestapo on our Ultimate USA Team).
Tell me how that team ever loses. I dare you. Find a way that team loses a game. It’s a trick question, because you can’t. Bryce Harper is the fourth outfielder. Every single pitcher would be the best pitcher on an MLB roster. If, for some reason, the greatest lineup ever constructed wasn’t hitting well I’m not sure if they would give up 10 runs all tournament. Dustin Pedroia/Dozier would probably hit ninth. Think about that. The number nine spot in the order would probably be taken by a guy who had 201 hits and hit .318 or someone who had 42 home runs last year. Paul Goldschmidt might hit seventh. Seventh! Ultimate Team USA would go 162-0 in an MLB season. Puerto Rico and the Dominican Republic are the only teams that could think about challenging them. It obviously doesn’t matter now, but this team probably would have ended the World Baseball Classic. They’d Mercy Rule every single team at least 15-0 by the fifth inning. They would have broken every other country’s collective spirit. They would have won so convincingly and in such embarrassingly dominant fashion that they would seriously consider canceling the event to preserve some semblance of diplomatic goodwill. But now that we won the title with the B/C squad, it’s time to bring out the big guns. 2021 has to be a scorched earth campaign. Take Trout, Bryant, Mookie, Bryce, and the boys and totally decimate the competition. Win the title with a combined score of 120-0. Then go back to sending fringe All Stars. Or college players. Hell, send me for all I care. Just put your foot down and show the world who its baseball daddy is and make a complete mockery of this fun, entertaining, no-Unwritten-Rules tournament. Now, someone do me a favor and cue the music!
Boy that Beast sure has a crackerjack singing voice (Emma Watson, if you’re reading this, I am, in fact, single).
source– “I just know the conversation gets a little bit more talked about when I’m a part of it,” James said before the Cavs practiced Tuesday on UCLA’s campus. “If it’s somebody else, it gets blown up a briefly, it gets talked about a little bit, but it doesn’t have legs and it’s gone. But as soon as I’m involved it’s just a whole different situation.”
When Cavs coach Tyronn Lue was asked whether James’ actions are judged differently, he responded, “You know that.”
James has played in 63 of the Cavs’ 69 games this season, sitting out five games for rest and one because of strep throat. Now in his 14th season and coming off six straight Finals appearances, the 32-year-old James has maintained a high level of play, averaging 26.2 points on 54.3 percent shooting, a career-high 8.4 rebounds and a career-high 8.8 assists per game.
Supporting James’ position is the fact that Silver was compelled to reach out to teams after James and his teammates sat out, calling the decision “an extremely significant issue for our league” and threatening “significant penalties” in the future if the practice is continued, as first reported by ESPN’s Ramona Shelburne, but failed to do so the week before when back-to-back MVP Stephen Curry and his Golden State Warriors teammates Klay Thompson, Draymond Green and Andre Iguodala were all held out of Golden State’s prime-time Saturday night game against the San Antonio Spurs on ABC.
Silver’s memo also called for owners to be more involved in the decision-making process when it comes to holding out their players, according to Shelburne’s report, which is a premise James found fault in.
“The owners be what? The owners be in the decision[-making process] of resting players?” an incredulous James asked. “There’s owners that are not even around the teams. There’s owners that are just owning the team because they just own the team. It’s whatever. What does that make any sense of?”
“I’ve played through injuries my whole career,” James added. “So I deserve to get a game [off] every now and then.”
What’s that? More LeBron James melodrama, you say? What else is new? What’s he saying now? Resting players during prime-time games is only an issue because of him (even though every time someone does it it sparks controversy and this was just the culmination of years of people complaining)? That’s just LeBron being LeBron. He’s the most persecuted player of all time (according to him). Don’t even know why I’m talking about it, to be honest. I guess I’ll read the whole thing since he’s usually got some good quotes buried near the end. “I deserve to get a game (off) every now and then?” Wait, what?
“I rest when I retire.”– Feb. 14, 2017
So, which is it, man? Do you never rest because you’re a complete freak who never gets tired/want to make a show of being the only good player on the team (according to him)? Or do you deserve some games off because you’ve been an ironman for years who never misses games/wants to make of show of carrying such a heavy load since he’s the only good player on the team (according to him)? You can’t have it both ways. This is the problem with LeBron. I really try to like him. When my (theoretical) future kids and grandkids ask me about him, I want to be able to tell them how great he was and how he was a force of nature, not tell them how big of a piece of shit he was. He just makes it so hard. Half of what he says is just woe-is-me, get-me-some-help-even-though-we-already-have-the-best-and-deepest-roster-in-the-league-and-it-keeps-getting-better-every-day-when-we-add-some-ring-chasing-veteran-for-the-league-minimum, everyone-hates-me-and-is-out-to-get-me-even-though-I’m-the-most-popular-player-in-the-league-and-Nike-gave-me-a-billion-dollar-lifetime-contract, while the other half is just him telling everyone how great he is and that the Warriors are beneath them (don’t the Cavs suck, LeBron? How can you be above the best team in the league (according to him)?). He’s so lame and contrived and contradictory. It only took him a month and a half to change his stance on resting! Or did he just forget he had already chosen to die on the “I don’t need to rest because I’m LeBron and my team stinks without me” hill and was ready to move on to the “I can rest whenever I want to because I’m LeBron and my team is so stacked they don’t need me” hill? He’s always got an out. He always, always has an excuse ready and is prepared to flip any criticism against him into an indictment on the league or the culture at large. It’s kind of brilliant, really. As much of a basketball genius he is, he’s almost smarter when it comes to playing the media (I’ll never forget my favorite Miami LeBron story: One time Chris Bosh came out and said LeBron was the smartest person he’d ever met because he could name where a bunch of NFL players went to college. Like whenever someone made a play he’d just say where that player went to school. First of all, I have to meet Chris Bosh if that’s his baseline for intelligence. He’ll think I’m the second coming of Einstein. Second, it’s such perfect LeBron. He obviously knew the impressionable Bosh would lap up any kind of trivial knowledge he could throw out there, so he probably just googled everyone playing in the game beforehand so he could name some real obscure 4th cornerback’s alma mater. The innocent and naïve Bosh was so thrilled to be in the same room as his hero he just lapped it up. Knowing Jadeveon Clowney went to South Carolina doesn’t make you smart, it just means you pay attention to football). He always knows how to make LeBron seem like the good guy/victim/underdog despite being the most hyped, admired, and physically talented basketball player ever. At the end of the day, that’s his greatest skill.
P.S. LeBron James directed a cease-and-desist order of sorts on Tuesday to LaVar Ball, the outspoken father of three — including star UCLAfreshman Lonzo Ball — who said earlier this month that his children are set up better for future success than those of the Cleveland Cavaliers’ star.
“Keep my kids’ name out of your mouth. Keep my family out of your mouth,” James said of LaVar Ball to ESPN on Tuesday, as the Cavaliers practiced on UCLA’s campus, two days after a road victory over the Los Angeles Lakers.
“This is dad to dad. It’s a problem now.”
People forget that LeBron is a father of three. You’d be forgiven if you didn’t know since he never mentions it. But he’s a father of three, so you can’t criticize him.
source– Pokemon developer Game Freak’s current project is unknown, but we may have just received some small clues.
A new job ad (translated by Siliconera and IGN) reveal that the company is hiring temporary employees to work on a “globally popular RPG” whose platform will be “console.”
The job requires someone with experience in creating character models to the level of Wii U and PS Vita, reports Siliconera. The title of the game is not stated, but it is apparently “an RPG game that is popular on a global scale,” that “just about anyone knows.”
In case you didn’t know, I’m kind of a huge Pokemon guy, and this is probably the greatest (possible) news I’ve ever heard. A full console version of Pokemon is all I’ve ever wanted in my life. Sure Pokemon Stadium and Pokemon Stadium 2 were great and Pokemon Colosseum is criminally underrated, but getting a legitimate Pokemon game on a full console would be a dream come true. Make it open world with current-gen graphics (find a way for Nintendo games not to look like they were made in 1985 compared to PS4 and Xbox, too), fully rendered battle sequences, maybe make it online so you can battle or team up with your friends or people anywhere in the world (yes, I know the new games already do this, but it’d be better if it happened on your television, trust me)? You’re talking about what could easily be the greatest selling game of all time. I’m baffled they haven’t done it already. This would easily be enough motivation for me to get a Nintendo Switch (it’s not because they were sold out when I tried to get one and Nintendo mysteriously decided not to give me a free one. I’m just waiting for the right game). Making a Pokemon console game is such a slam dunk, impossible-to-lose scenario. Just do it already.
And for anyone saying Game Freak might actually be making something other than a Pokemon game, that’s like saying Arby’s serves something other than roast beef. Sure, it’s technically true, but you’d have to be the dumbest person alive to try it. Go look at everything Game Freak has come out with since Pocket Monsters Red and Green. Click Medic? Drill Dozer? HarmoKnight? Tembo the Badass Elephant? Are those even real games? I’m pretty none of these qualify as being “popular on a global scale.” This is a Pokemon game, plain and simple, and I’m going to be first in line to get it. Gotta Catch ‘Em All, bitch!
Praise Dolan, it’s finally over. Today I woke assuming I’d have to watch all the college basketball games on my laptop since I didn’t have CBS (America’s oldest channel) (and a staple of basic cable), when lo and behold, channel 3 exists once more on my television. Dreams really do come true. Some people see having HBO and Showtime as status symbols, but I view CBS in the same light. I mean think about it- CBS is basic cable. You don’t need cable service to get it. You just need an antenna and you get it for free. How many people do you know that can say they have CBS? I’m not sure I know anyone good enough to have CBS.
I just want to send a sincere thank you to the Dolan Family, lead of course by the immortal James Dolan, for such a swift resolution to this matter. I mean, when you’re a billion dollar company, finishing negotiations with one (1) CBS affiliate that wanted a few hundred dollars more in only three months is crazy. Such a great display of compromise and charity. Letting us normal folk enjoy the luxury of CBS. I’ve never been so touched before in my life. From now on, I’m going to recommend Optimum to everyone I know who has no other cable option and doesn’t want Dish.
When you get CBS (yes, that CBS. The one you’ve had your entire life) back: